Another Way

The emails I get tend to be heavy with parents feeling oppressed by the weight of the school requirements that have been thrust onto them,

"My teen won't go to school."

"My 14-year-old is withdrawing and just a shell of who they were.”

"I can barely get them to engage in anything anymore – the spark is gone."

"Our relationship is suffering, and I don't want to sacrifice it."

All these parents have been backed into a corner. For some, the compulsory nature of school erodes relationships at home. Parents are forced to impose the rules by the mainstream school system, or they "get in trouble." Too many missed days, skipping classes, failing tests or assignments. Schools call parents who now have to be heavy-handed for the school's regulations. Parents aren't given a choice around enforcing the school system's rules and agenda and they hold this weight and must implement it, even when many feel unsupported by their schools.

More and more students are struggling with the one-size-fits-all school approach. Large classroom sizes, outdated and frankly uninteresting topics, busy-work that feels meaningless, grades and rating students against one another. Mandatory attendance and early start times go against the science of developing teenage brains. Neurodiversity and IEPs are said to be supported, yet still, many feel it's lacking, or their child is being made to feel they're "broken." There seems to be a disconnect between what is being studied and discovered about the needs of tweens and teens and the 100-year-old school system. Change is needed, and it's not the kids who have to change…or the parents. It's time we separate education from school.

These days, the kids really do have a calculator in their pocket at their whim - even though previous generations were threatened that we wouldn't. They have the world at their fingertips. Facts, research, tutorials - anything! They research in real-time during conversations with friends, and misinformation is caught and rebutted. The kids are sharp, in touch, and passionate. And yet, we expect them to sit for 45 min every hour listening to someone talk at them about information that they "...need to know one day" or that "...they'll be thankful they know about…one day." Have you sat through a meeting that you have felt is pointless, where you could be spending your precious time doing something more meaningful? Have you done that day in and day out for years (other than your own education!) where someone else has decided what you need to listen to and for how long, even though you know you have skills and thoughts to explore more fully? It's exhausting and disempowering. No wonder passion is dulled.

Around the world, there are education settings that are centred on young people's passions and interests. Spaces that allow freedom to arrive at a time that suits the individual, that don't grade or test and are based solely on encouraging deep dives into topics and interests – trusting that they'll learn the information needed to move forward. Spaces that empower young people to be in control of their day and learning. Where autonomy is valued and protected. Self-directed learning centres are an innovative approach to education with the Learner at the forefront and in choice.

At Passages, a self-directed learning centre, we have created an environment where young people follow their interests, connect with one another, engage in debates and challenging conversations and are valued, empowered, and encouraged. Where everyone is accountable to the Community, and the adult's role is as a facilitator or mentor supporting the needs of the Learners and Community.

Many people who have only known life in the traditional school system get defensive when I talk about this unique approach to education.

"But how will they learn what they need to know?!"

Who has decided what they need to know? And if it's so necessary, one will learn it naturally through life interactions.

"But how will they learn that they must do hard things and suffer like we all did? Life isn't easy."

Suffering doesn't equal learning how to handle difficult situations. Sitting through a boring class doesn't teach them "grit" or resilience. They learn these skills through working through their own social conflicts or when they're challenged with the roadblock that to move forward with their interest it will require them to do something annoying or boring to get to the next step. And when someone is in choice and has their own goals, they do this willingly without a fight. And, perhaps we need to unpack why the idea of "I suffered, so you should too" is thrown around so easily - aren't we hoping to break generational suffering?

"But Math!! No one will ask to learn math without being forced."

We regularly see Learners ask for Math classes. They want to know how to budget, plan purchases, and figure out the costs of items. They want to sew something and learn measurement and estimating. Coding and 3D printing helps them understand variables and applications in the real world. They learn the math they need to know for their individual life.

At self-directed learning centres, education becomes individualized. It becomes an authentic education based on each person's strengths and needs. We value who they are as people and their personal skills and goals. They see where they want to improve, and we help them realize their goals through mentorship and support. Tests are unnecessary when one has established the plans and can assess themselves by asking, "Did I learn what I needed to learn for the next step?"

So what are they learning that is so innovative?

How to communicate opinions, needs, and challenges. How to create goals and break down how to achieve them. How to evaluate what skills are needed and when. For the older teens, much of the days are spent conversing, digging into the meaningful topics they're grappling with: the state of the world, politics, human rights, the environment, leaders, and local issues. Of course, memes are shared, and TikToks swapped, but those quickly set the stage for a deeper conversation by all.

Passages is a democratic space, which means the Community Meeting is the heart of the centre. A weekly gathering to bring proposals forward, discuss Centre issues, and review the budget for resources and trips. These are all run and directed by the young people. As a community caring for one another, they all want to see the group grow and move forward, so the young people take ownership to make the space a safe(r), welcoming, inclusive environment. Not because the adults said so, but because they want that for themselves. And we equip them with the ability to communicate their needs and concerns – the soft skills of the future that are so desperately needed. Facts and processes can be looked up and re-learned when required, so spending impressionable teen years on how to converse, listen, support, think of creative solutions and empathize is where we believe we need to support our young people.

And yes, they CAN have careers, go to university and college and lead successful (to them!) lives without compulsory mainstream schooling. So with that fear removed and knowing they'll one day be out of your basement, earning an income and happy, what is there to lose?